I am preparing to leave my lovely family for 3 days and 2 nights. I am attending a conference, 4 hours from home, that will provide me with information to help me do my job better. My position requires that I stay up to date on current laws and procedures, so I really need to attend. But, before I can leave, I have to make sure that the world goes on as smoothly as possible in my absence. Ok, need to make sure that there is food and drink, properly labeled and ready for the next 3 days. You know when a man opens a refrigerator, it's like a black hole....they see nothing. "Ok honey, the taco meat is on the 2nd shelf, on the right and it looks like ground hamburger meat with seasoning...find it? Ok, now look on the 3rd shelf for the flour tortillas...good....now pull out the cheese draw and find the shredded cheese. Good...now the Pace picante sauce in the door on the 2nd shelf. What....how long do you heat up the meat in the microwave....and how long for the tortillas...what?....where are the plates?" WTH!! It may sound trivial...but it REALLY happens!
I also have to make sure that everyone has clothes for 3 days, underwear, socks, jeans, t-shirts, shoes, etc. The schedule of events for all the children must be typed and printed in duplicate. Give one to husband, one to friend and leave one a the house. Pick up this kid at 5 after track practice; pick up this kid at 6:30 after tennis practice, have these 2 kids to Cub Scouts by 7:00. Oh, but make sure you find some time for everyone to do their homework and feed them the tacos I just told you how to make.
I also have to pack for myself. Makeup, toothbrush, hair stuff, deodorant, jammies, shoes, hose, socks, clothes, money....oh yeah, I need money to pay for everything that I already bought and paid for at my house, so I can eat something. Dear God....is it really worth all this effort just to go away for a few days?? Redneck Mama says....Hell yes!!! Bring on the Peach Bellini's and cheesecake...I'm a free woman for 3 days!!
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